I hate brushing my teeth at night because that signifies that you can’t have anymore food and I’m just never ready for that kind of commitment
sorta wanna die sorta wanna kiss you sorta wanna get my shit together sorta wanna lose twenty pounds in a month??
humans are fucking pathetic look at this little nigga come out of his egg on his own no crying no helpless “wah wah cut my umbilical cord” bullshit he come out and he already on the hunt for reptilian pussy no fear no games. and we’re the evolved species? smh
how do i lose weight quickly and easily and also how do i gain the ability to fly and breathe fire and how do i cheat death
I’ve got 99 problems and 98 of them can be attributed to poor time management and self control.
Women that oppose feminism because they feel they personally have all the rights and respect they need are so incredibly selfish and ignorant to the plight of women not only in their own country, but across the developing world.
TINY TURTLE INVESTIGATORS: THE CASE OF THE LARGE STRAWBERRY
GOOD MORNING EVERYONE
“HAVE YOU TRIED BALANCING ON IT”
“YES OF COURSE I TRIED BALANCING ON IT JENKINS THIS IS NOT MY FIRST DAY AS A TINY TURTLE INVESTIGATOR”
lacy underwear makes me feel powerful and unstoppable
Favourite way to wake up. Alone in the truck with a gnarly view. 👌
oh my god GOALS